I am puke
I just broke up with Liz. I feel awful so I put two free rentals on her Blockbuster account.
So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
i'm not sure when it happened but apparently now it's topless bar night, im wearing a leotard and everyone is looking at me like i'm cheating.
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
Randomize