i just told my boss to make it rain at camelot later...what is wrong with me?
I have the sudden urge to buy a Snuggie and wear it to the grocery store.
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
i woke up to 115 texts from him all saying "do you love me??"
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
Please remind me tomorrow that I ate a loaf of jimmy johns bread on the toilet 5 mins ago
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
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