Jerry, you need to find god
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
Have you ever tried to have sex with a fairy? My penis is literally bigger than her.
He told me I had smoking hot areolas then he wins an executive of the year award. How does that even happen?
Omg i got really stoned and used a makeup app on my grandma...well, I’m definitely not adopted
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
Randomize
