i just told my boss to make it rain at camelot later...what is wrong with me?
I got so many pubes stuck in her braces that when she yanked her head, I cried out like that one girl you "accidentally" rear-ended last week. Bald spots are battle scars.
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
I just totok an inventory of my purse: 1 apple, 1 pair of underwear, 7 condoms, $18 in ones, a check with "for sexual healing" in the subject line, and a 4 oz bottle of wine.
Oh! and a letter from a judge saying I got an interview. Cause that balances it out.
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
I just want to drink bourbon and have sex and then eat like, a Christmas cookie.
Not to play devil's advocate, but, considering how our species has evolved so far... I'm kinda rooting for the sun on the whole heat death thing.
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
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