Hey man sorry I got all grabby
Are you missing anything? I found a wedding ring in my bed this morning.....
Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
He told me they were just razor bumps!
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
No I don't want to see you. You're the reason that I'm going to need a new liver by the time I'm 30.
Having sex with my girlfriend wearing my old Tom Brady jersey on the day he's freed is the closest I'll come to a 3way with Tom
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
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