so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
i looked at my phone and realized all i had said to her the entire night was misspelled variations of "NOTHING IS THE SAME" over and over. she eventually stopped replying.
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
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