She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
I walked in on him cutting a hole in the condom.
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
His pick up line was "your one sexy pumpkin, I'd love to carve." Why would you let me go home with him?
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
Every bar we ever go to has a woman there who hates him. Getting so much vagina has never seemed so not glorious
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
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