dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
When I opened my laptop there was a half eaten little debbie oatmeal cream pie inside.
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
Yeah! I was just fired because there was an over hire and the new girl is hotter than me. Seeing as how the new girl is my baby sister I think punching my manager is excusable.
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
It’s like I’m living in some alternate wet dream universe right now
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
Randomize