I would go down on you faster than GM stock
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
my roommate's gf just broke up with him and hes in his room crying and listening to coldplay while beating off to pictures of her...
I'm one shot of soco 100 away from fucking a mailbox
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
Just now remembered singing Trashy Women at the reception. Not karaoke, just sang along with the mic I stole from the DJ. All while still in my dress drinking champagne from the bottle
The bartender from Thursday remembered me... And gave me a FLAMING BUCKET of alcohol.
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
Watching her eat just hurts me
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
I saw a kid peeing outback so I yelled "you have a small pecker, but its ok cuz when life gives you lemons..." and proceeded to throw lemons at him
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
He came over and fucked me while my conference call was on mute. Working from home is the best.
My favorite bra is missing and I smell like beer and bad decisions. This is definitely a sign that hoe mode is activated.
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
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