You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
the paramedic just looked at me like "you again?"
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
Randomize
