If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
I just threw up during my phone interview for the largest PR firm in the world.
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
Pretty sure the girl next to me in Chipotle just came out to her mom.
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
So mom called me from the hospital laughing her ass off. Apparently my sister is allergic to cocaine...
I thought I was smashed last night but the girl trying to pee in the fridge had me beat. True story.
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
This is the nicest bathroom I've ever been drunk in. The urinal is gold.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Randomize
