when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
Is it 3pm? Or am I losing my mind because it's pickled in vodka and diet coke?
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
It's that moment where you find out the girl you've been dating for 6 months is a mob daughter. Post breakup.
The only thing I'm asking santa for is my period.
And vodka?
And vodka.
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
there is glitter all over my balls
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
Randomize
