Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.
He's like the fucking Houdini of bras. Not only did I not feel him take it off I didn't find it until two days later.
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
It got awkward when the girl working at planned parenthood continued to hit on me, after she knew about my STDs.
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
eggs and jello shots do not qualify as 'brunch'
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
Ever look at an ex and wonder...was I drunk that entire relationship??
Yes, yes I do.
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