Taylor Swift is so right about you.
are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
Just found a dugout in my rental car glove box. Suddenly my mood is upbeat.
Please tell me that text was part of your elaborate Brett Favre costume; otherwise, dude, wtf?
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
Randomize
