I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
Someone was asleep on the couch next to us and woke up. We paused and he yelled "gentlemen, behold! Sex!"
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
I actively tried geting in the guy's pants and ended up in the girl's. I'm bad at this whole straight while drunk thing.
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
PSA. Do not shart while wearing a jock strap at work. That is all.
Randomize