Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
my boss just made his own remix to aaron carter's i want candy. i cant decide if its the funniest or most embarrassing thing ive seen
I hit her tiny dog with a horseshoe an hour ago. Her and her mom cried as it laid on the ground shaking. Im drunk.
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
I had a dream that my roommate walked in on me masturbating and I hissed "I'm not stopping this orgasm train for the likes of you" and just kept going
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
It's not my fault you decided to fall in love with a Frodo Baggins lookalike
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
My life is pants optional.
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
I wanna print it out and hang it on the fridge like parents do with good report cards.
oh the joys of a picture of a negative pregnancy test
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
Randomize
