You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
No one figured out why I brought along the vibrating massager.
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
LinkedIn just suggested I might know the guy I caught my wife fucking.
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
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