I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
That dick who always called me a slut in high school showed up at the clinic with boner problems. Then I was assigned as his nurse. Who's laughing now. I AM.
whenever he tweets that he wants to get blackout it's like a neon sign for "i want to bang you tonight"
I like how my motivation to lose weight is so I can wear a nude bikini and get covered in body paint for the tribal party. Priorities.
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
I'M OFFICIATING THIS WEDDING. HOLY SHIT.
We ended the night eating peanutbutter with our hands and smoking cigarettes in the house at 4am. Fucking Everclear, man.
Randomize
