I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
hey, we don't wanna leave the house because we're watching fireworks on tv. this is america.
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
you threw up out the window, wiped your face with a twenty dollar bill, and threw that out the window too.
did we at least go back and get it?
how else do you think we got jack in the box...?
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
he actually said the words "do you want to pet the lizard?" with a straight face as he unzipped his pants
She was either really drunk or really not interested. Everytime I tried to ask her about herself she would respond with a line from Stepbrothers.
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
So the tow truck driver didn't charge us because Ian convinced him that he was sent out by God to share his cocaine with us.
He motorboated me, gave me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
Randomize
