Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
I just spent the last two hours on the phone with Emily trying to explain to her how to finger herself.
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
i was sitting in the back of a squad car completely stoned watching airplanes take off
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
I need you there. I need someone to glance at when other people inevitably annoy me.
Desperate times call for desperate measures. But he promised me no small talk so that was nice
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
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