Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
I've spent too much of my life staring at my bberry and counting to 5 to see if it blinks
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?
He called me at two in the morning to tell me he was throwing the tiny Thor hammer at moving vehicles. Apparently he missed the guy on the motorcycle.
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
I just watched this dude try to convince this girl to go home with him. She was like, That's cute, you're cute.and she just walked away. Man I'm so not drunk enough to be around this level of sad.
Would I be a horrible mom if I got a babysitter at 6am so I could go get laid.
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
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