my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened?
Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
Just woke up to find myself in a random bed with two people next to me having sex. I thought it would be awkward to just suddenly get up so i think I'm gonna lie here and pretend I'm still sleeping.
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
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