Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
It feels like Jesus smacked me in the face with the new testament for drinking so much last night
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
This morning I proved to myself and all the kids on the playground that I can't puke and drive.
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
I met her at the liquor store. I hope I'm wearing a condom
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
IT IS CHRISTMAS EVE AND I AM SUPPOSED TO BE HAVING SEX WITH AN ATTRACTIVE BLACK MAN IN THE NEXT FEW DAYS AND I JUST GOT MY PERIOD. WHEN PEOPLE ASK ME WHY I DON'T BELIEVE IN GOD I WILL TELL THEM OF THIS DAY.
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
Randomize
