just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
Apparently she saw two women get in a slapping match over a comforter at target yesterday. She said it was awesome. Clearly I take after her.
Maybe tomorrow I'll be drunk again and can provide you with texts at a more reasonable hour. Here's hoping. GOodnight. Tebow loves you
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
Do you participate in Sunday morning booty calls?
Dammit! I didn't see this message, of course I do.
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize
