She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
you refused to leave the drive-thru at mcdonalds until the cashier took a jello shot
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
You kept trying to use my cat as a napkin.
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Justin Timberlake, while dressed as Britney Spears. Fuck Jessica Biel, all my 90's dreams are coming true.
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
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