the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
Dude... You bled on his hand... At this point it doesn't matter that you called him your exes name, seriously.
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
you don't know true fear until you are a convinced that velociraptors are trying to kill you through your roof.
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
You showed up at 4 a.m with two middle-aged men, a 200 dollar bottle of wine, three bottles of beer, no shoes on, and a half eaten red velvet cake.You are never drinking absinthe again.
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
Randomize
