UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
I swear that when I have my own bathroom, I'm gonna lock myself in there and masterbate for at least 3 days in sheer appreciation of it.
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
When she saw "buy condoms" on my to do list she figured out pretty quick we were breaking up.
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
Dear in laws. I am not spending any holidays with you. I dislike your company. A lot.
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
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