how do flat chested girls get laid?
I was to drunk to drive all the way up there, so we just had rough phone sex instead
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
She's officially a Tinder poltergeist.
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
Just an fyi, you also tried to wrangle a peacock last night.
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
Randomize
