I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
mike has just informed me of all the things he would put in his pussy if he was a woman. this includes door stops, power drills & g.i. joes.
"and then my dad would be all like 'hey mike, where's the remote?'"
I woke up with my left arm looking like it got mauled by a lion. Oo and she said someone broke her car window.
Just realized these events may be related.
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
Hopefully they won't bring up last year's Christmas party. I kind of predicted my great aunt's death...
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
Randomize
