no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
Masturbating after my cheeseburger. It's unavoidable.
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
The one thing I know about living in Vegas is the closest I'll ever come to being a father is singing the theme song from Full House to a garbage can while I eat an entire birthday cake.
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
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