I'm laying in your front yard are you home
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
Mistake of the day: loudly discussing my gay hookups on the phone at the dmv in upstate NY... this must be what leprosy feels like
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
I DEMAND FORESKIN
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
Randomize
