Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
So I tried to call my phone from his phone and was like, "hey, my name is not in here..I thought you had my number" turns out he has my number saved as "gives good head"
I hate it when I can only see straight when I close one eye. I feel like that deserts the purpose of seeing with two eyes
it's a little hard to watch the basketball games with my family considering they keep cheering for the guy that i had a one night stand with...
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
She woke me up with an urgent call telling me she was rolling on Mollie and swimming in the ocean. I mean that's just great. If she drowns, I'll feel responsible.
You made me pull over because you thought a leaf was a twenty rolling across the road.
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
I just figured out the time exactly by how many shots and beers that I've had since this morning. I either have a terrible problem, or a great solution.
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
Randomize
