I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
just realized the sink is the perfect height to piss into never cleaning the toilet again
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
We're in the emergency room. He concussed himself trying to pop all the bubbles on my "one bubble a day" wall calender with his face.
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
I'm gonna cougar town the shit out of that prom.
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
Randomize
