I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
can't believe I ate straight coffee grounds to stay awake for that
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
He just ranted to some customer about fourth of July being ruined and I just shouted USA the whole time in the background. It was kinda epic
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE
Randomize