You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
is there a legit reason for the weird voicemail I got at 2:14am?all I could make out was 'help me' 'two hours' and 'toilet butt'. wtf did u drink.
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
I feel like my chances would have been better if I hadn't told her "I need to fuck you before you leave."
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
Woke up in a fanny pack with a bag of cocaine on my cheek
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
I'm literally about to create a tinder account. Just so someone drives me to get food.
Randomize
