If I could pick any std, I would pick genital herpes. Seriously. Have you seen the commercials? The lady is riding a fucking bike, swimming, and on a date. I have a perfectly fine vag and all I do is go to the library.
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
I keep getting texted pictures of my husband with other men. I can't figure out if he wants a divorce or a threesome?
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
I've made a new rule for socializing in the winter: if it doesn't involve me orgasming or getting drunk I can't make it
Randomize
