She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
She tried to wake me up by touching my dick. I kept pretending to be asleep.
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
my life is about to be the like the hunger games except with penises. and im going to win.
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
I guess I just stopped wanting to rip his balls out and started being okay with him being alive. that's a typical feeling for exes right?
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
Randomize
