She is making me post-sex grilled cheese at 2 am wearing only shorts and cowboy boots. I am so in love
I apparently took a 45 minute shower, and became best friends with his mom.
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
A hefty woman and I mean hefty shoved her number in my pocket at the gym without as much as a hello, winked and kept walking. Going to use your bed to defile her, don't want her to know where I live or have my neighbors see! Thanks, you're a pal!
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
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