do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
The bosnian sent me a sext with his dick next to a comcast remote. It went up to the "stop" button. Ironic and appropriate. Grab your remote and imagine it.
You've ruined television for me.
You cant carve pumpkins without vodka. It's a Halloween tradition.
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
I love that you'd blow off your high school reunion to get shit faced in an aquarium with us
Um. We all know how I feel about sea life
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
You thought the flashing lights were strobe lights when they were loading you into the ambulance. You asked the EMT if he had any X.
Randomize
