We're watching an ocean show on Discovery Channel and drinking every time they say "dolphins." PS. Seals kill birds. Tell all your friends.
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
Why did that cocktail waitress get to sleep with Tiger for 2 years, and all I ever got for living in Whorelando for five years is a couple of pictures with Joey Fatone
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
I don't like pregnant me. I eat very large burritos, I don't like having sex and I can't even finish a Blue Moon.
No we didn't talk. I was high and doing naked yoga in the living room when she walked in so it was just awkward. I didn't even know my dad had a girlfriend.
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
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