My brain says no but my pants say off.
Tonight was like the Noah's Ark of alcohol. I had to have two of everything.
I put my bosses number in my phone as "Do not call," I shouldve known my drunk curiosity would overcome any desire I had to keep my job.
again?
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
Randomize
