You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
woman puking in liquor store parking lot at 9:30 on a tuesday morning = best commute ever.
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
His penis is small and he doesnt like Harry Potter. HE HAS NO REDEEMING QUALITIES WHAT AM I EVEN DOING HERE
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
We had to take the hinges off the bathroom door. Needless to say, you are no longer welcome at that bar
Ugh. Lets go crawl into a dairy-gluten-chlamydia free hole somewheres.
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
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