Please forgive me. I will pay for your emergency room visit.
What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
then you asked me to turn your jeans into "jorts" just long enough to cover your ballsack
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
I stayed up for hours making sure you didnt pass out in a mountain of your own puke. But when I heard you yell AWWWW FUUCCKK, somehow I knew everything would be ok
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
Lord give me the strength to not check my tinder messages at my grandmother's wake.
NOT ALL OF US HAVE THE HANDS OF GODDAMN ANGELS YOU KNOW
Randomize
