Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
My wedding band has saved me from at least four cases of herpes tonight.
You're the only person that can successfully use titties and Jesus in the same sentence.
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
my liver is dry heaving
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
Randomize
