brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
I rocked his world in the back of my car in an overly-lit, heavily trafficked parking lot. Middle age is amazing!
I'm going to go ahead and refrain from sexting you in an airport that is currently at a "level orange" security threat.
Randomize
