I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
I wonder what it would be like to go to the dry cleaners and not have to inform them that all my clothes are stained with booze.
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
I hit him with a car. Nothing says I hate you more than backing into someone with a fucking car.
She offered to massage my back by hitting it with a sparkly purple double dildo... Bi chicks can get creepy
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?
I said "I am wrapped in the Cocoon Of Comfort! You should go." He started to argue and I yelled "COCOON OF COMFORT!!!" silencing him
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
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