When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
Been in the ER for 3 hours now. This hospitals transition to paperless is not going well. But my doctor looks like Elton John and just gave me percocet
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
You're going to be mad because I got baked, but not that mad because I'm bringing home kfc.
I just pulled back the shower curtain to reveal Cinnamon Toast Crunch and a spoon in the bathtub. Ambien is a hell of a drug.
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
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