You wouldn't stop asking the hibachi cook if his knife was a hattori hanzo
I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
I told the cop it was my birthday and he said "happy fuckin birthday", handcuffed me and threw me in the back of the cop car.
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
Too many sundays start with me waking up still drunk in my car.
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize
