Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
I only kidnapped one of them. chill
So I went into my gym pretty wasted and asked the trainer guy if i could order a cock meat sandwich. Needless to say, I'm canceling my membership tomorrow.
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"
You know when you can feel the alcohol in your toes? That's a great feeling.
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
Not yoga, whiskey. Totally mis-typed whiskey.
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
Randomize