You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
Hey just to warn you theres a really fat guy passed out in front of our front door snoring. Don't touch him, he's in god's hands now.
do you find it slutty that the last person I had sex with is also the person who sings my ringtone ?
Although I wish I was out drinking, this cough syrup has me slightly more optimistic than usual.. I heavily debating trying to find mystical creatures and selling them to rich people as pets
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
she's like the billy mays of hookups...touch my boobs and i'll throw in this blow job ABSOLUTELY FREE
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
Note to self: if you decide to go to the gym when you're coming down from your day high to shoot some hoops, do NOT play pickup basketball with the big black dudes who need a sixth
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
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